© 2022 Winterhaven Hospice
All Rights Reserved
People often shy away from talking about end-of-life wishes. In fact, the Conversation Project found that although 92% of people feel it’s important to discuss end-of-life wishes, only 32% actually do. But it doesn’t have to be a scary topic that you avoid. In fact, it’s incredibly important to have the discussion.
As your loved one grows older, they may be hesitant to talk about their end-of-life wishes. And you may not want to bring it up because it forces you to face the fact that they won’t be here forever. Trust us, we get it. However, it is incredibly important to talk about it. Here’s why.
End-of-life conversations give us the chance to die well. What does that mean? It means our wishes are known and followed, and we have the opportunity to live our life – right up to the end – the way we choose to.
By discussing their end-of-life wishes, you will have a better understanding of how they want things to happen. This will prevent you from needing to try to guess or figure it out on your own.
That brings us to our next point. Knowing what a person wants makes it easier on those caring for them. If you discuss it with your loved one, you don’t have to worry about making the right decisions on their behalf because you already know what they want. If you don’t discuss it, you may worry if you are doing right by them. Talking about what they want and having a clear plan eliminates this pressure.
It’s also not uncommon – in situations where the patient becomes unresponsive, such as in a medical emergency – for the family to argue over what the right decision is. This just creates added and unnecessary stress and trauma for everyone. All of which can be avoided by knowing and understanding your loved one’s wishes ahead of time.
Your loved one may already know what their end-of-life wishes are. They might just be unsure of how to bring it up. Maybe they just need you to start the conversation. But how do you?
This Conversation Starter Guide is a wonderful tool to help us get the conversation started. It includes prompts to answer to help cover all the bases. Encourage your loved one to fill it out, with you or on their own. Then, you can sit down together and talk about their answers. If you have this guide printed out, you can take your own notes and save it so you are prepared.
It’s important to keep the conversation going. Our wishes can change over time so it’s important to keep one another updated.
End-of-life planning isn’t about dying – it’s about living. Understanding your loved one’s end-of-life wishes allows you to understand how they want to live their last months, weeks, and days. So, start the conversation and keep it going.